An interview with Gems Paandu.

Hello Sir. What is your name?

Paandu. Gems Paandu

Ahem. What car do you own?

I don't have one.

Then what mode of transport do you have?

I have a motorized quadricycle, called the Nano.

Oh, so you are one amongst the millions of Nanoists?

No. I am one amongst the few married Onanists. Otherwise, we won't be able to fit into the Nano.

Sir, how much mileage do you get?

I am not sure. Since I got the base model, I discovered it didn't come with a fuel tank. I didn't ask for one either in the fear of rising oil prices.

Sir, is it faster and quieter than the LS 600 hL?

The last time I heard my friend's Nano, it sounded like an atom bomb. It makes a lot of sound but does not budge from the same spot.

How would you rate the ownership experience?

I believe in Green living. However, the experience thus far has been a bit unpredictable.

Why so?

I used to drive a Reva. I spent all my savings on it but never earned a penny thereafter as it could not reach my office in one charge. It's electric supply was more unpredictable than the Government's. Then I bought a Nano. I cut out a hole in the floor like Mr.Flintstone. However, now I needed to eat so much more to move the car that my gas emissions have sky rocketed. Hence I am polluting even more now.

First Rover, now a loner...

Tata is at it again. After sending shock waves through the industry on their proposal for acquiring Jaguar and Land Rover, they are now planning on relaunching the Indica in the UK market. Tata, a huge conglomerate, has stamped themselves in the the minds of the Englishmen after the acquistion of Corus. Of course, this will definitely help boost brand value. After a failed stint in 2003 to sell the Indica through Rover, the think tank has been reconsidering the idea, but this time themselves. Rover, which was on the verge of bankruptcy was trying to sell the Indica at a premium of 6-8.5K pounds per car, hoping it would help turn around their fortunes. However, the plan bombed and with that so did the Indica leave the UK too.

However, reports from back then suggested that the car was probably overpriced by around a 1000 quid. Tata is now designing the next-gen Indica, the X3, the first major revamp. This, sould be a significantly better product, testing is currently being carried out with 1.4 litre dicor as well as Fiat-sourced 1.3 litre mulitjet diesel engines, the same unit doing duty on the Suzuki Swift. The Indica's strongest point in India has simply been the economy of diesel and space(read sedan-sized interiors). The new gen Indica I expect, will be a good contemporary looking product - as was the first generation car - with great space again and hopefully a big jump in quality. And when I say quality, it's an all-encompassing term including build quality, reliability and 'attention to detail', a few factors on which the Indica was a bit weak. The UK customer will not be as forgiving. Tata you listening?

The only other point of consideration is, if Tata does bag Land Rover and Jaguar, Tata will have much more on stake. They will have to - again, have to - ensure that the Indica succeeds and ensure that people would be able to rely on Tata selling cars. For if they don't, I don't know how many of them would be game to buy an English brand from an Indian company that can't make cars themselves. Now Tata, will you just go ahead and do it!!!

Harley's 'n Mangoes...sure you didn't think you would hear it together

There is a lot of ado over the Harley and mango deal. For the late starters, India is relaxing pollution norms for Harleys, so they can be Euro 3 compliant as compared to the standard Euro 4. For the now thirsty-and-bored-of-waiting-bikers, it means we'll finally get to set our rears on a Harley, if - and that's a big 'if' in the largest and wildest font you can find - you can afford to buy one. I wonder if it's a good thing, selling our mangoes for American cult machines.

The argument against such an arrangement is that, India would be selling its mangoes(a food source), which has a sizable chunk of it's population under poverty. My question here, does India have a mango deficit? Googling Harleys and mangoes(a match made in heaven you said?), I found here that we can export 8,000-10,000 tons mangoes a year as of now, as said by the Chairman of Agriculture and Processed food products Export Development Authority, India. And this would be at around $36/dozen, quite a sum. This in front of our total annual production figures of 14 million tons, looks like pocket change almost. A basic fact, buying power needs to be created in the first place to create demand. So for those who think this deal will make our country more impoverished, I doubt it, at the worst it would make a few farmers richer and give them incentive to produce even more. If the export of mangoes is kept to a controllable sum, then the government can ensure that domestic prices will stay in control.

And is pollution a problem? Hell yeah! But come to think of it, these are bikes which would at best sell in double figures now. I would be more worried by all the 1L cars that would be puttering around our roads in the future. The fact of the matter is, we are talking about some real small numbers here. A few bikes, a few mangoes, but that marque Harley Davidson is always known to create quite a stir isn't it?

Spyke it up!

Exotic wheels, chrome exhausts, 400 horses and you drooling. Spyker. Resurrected in 1999, the marque shares only the name with the original that shut shop in the 1920's which is credited with making the first ever four-wheel drive racer. And now they plop Audi V8s and W12s into some spanked out bonnets. But just why am I talking about Spyker?

That's because they are heading our way! The V8 powered C8 Spyder and Laviolette will get to scrape our pothole splattered holy land first, after which probably even the D12 Peking-to-Paris, which looks like they just stretched a C8 on photoshop. And before I forget, their cars look a touch quirky with a few chrome touches and overly contoured surfaces, those side-view mirrors looking like they were plucked of the bonnet of some whackoly modded Scorpio. Hopefully the detailing will loook better in the flesh. But it sure does have a neat logo on the bonnet, that propeller dating back to the fact that Spyker made planes preceding World War One.

Check this out. The interesting bit is that they are planning on an engineering design centre! Surprising it seems at first to see a supercar manufacturer extract engineering services in a country whose market is just starting to mature, but on the component level it probably makes sense. You should be able to design a mounting bracket irrespective of the power pumped out by the engine, that’s straight engineering right...well almost! So it's another one to the list of R&D centres setting shop here. Dutch origin, German heart and designed in India. And were you talking about globalization?

The one problem that Spyker might face is that they are not as popular a brand as say Lamborghini or Porsche, which of course would be of prime importance for a buyer in this segment, for a car especially like this one is also a status symbol. Hopefully, their F1 foray will help build them a better brand image.

For the whole Spyker product line-up, click here.....

And just as I was talking about it in my first post, its confirmed. This is going to be a huge bonus for Tamil Nadu, what with the trio making the single biggest manufacturing facility in the country...

The Guru on the Bullet

I came across this article a long time ago, now I would guess its probably almost 6 years. And I didn’t really understand it as much as the author would have wanted the reader to at that time, but for some reason that article stuck in my head, the reason I think being that I loved the bullet. If you are a biker, check out this article. If you are a bulleteer, you would have read it. And if you still have not, please go ahead with the ritual. Read 'N enjoy.

Bond, a Cat & a Swede...

You recently saw Casino Royale and found yourself walking out of the theatre salivating on Bond's women and his equally mesmerising drive, the DBS. We love to crib at the state of our industry which of course is now one of the most important in the world. So our hunger is sated with a three-pronged attack, Aston Martin, Jaguar and Volvo. That just made a lump in your throat.
Yes it's true, Aston will come in with DC's jewel the V8 Vantage, the DB9 and the Vanquish. Volvo with the S80 and the XC90 and Jaguar with probably it's S-type and the XKR. There may not be enough to choose from for the common man but there sure as hell is a barrage of models out there for the billionares to get confused enough to scurry away from dealerships.
Volvo's S80 will be entering a segment which Mercedes has made their own and the Beemers and Audis are trying to cut themselves a slice of the pie, it's a Swede trying to spoil an all German affair. Volvo has always been known for making some of the safest cars on the road but the S80 might feel a touch insecure in this segment. It's crowded, Mercedes, BMW and Audi have already bought space that the S80 wants to enter. And the XC90, well...truth be told, they look a touch bland. And Volvo is probably not the most desirable brand out there where the three-pointed stars rule the roost. The point is, what makes a Volvo so unique to buy one over the above mentioned brands? Ya ya armoured like a tank, but the Germans engineer them pretty dam well too. And I don't know if the Volvo's or more specifically if the S80 will come with that 4.4L Yamaha-derived V8 and it might not be competetively priced if it does. But here is to wishing all the best to Volvo.
Jaguar. Now thats a bit more exciting. That XKR, a bit of a quirky front end I personally feel but still one hell of an awe-inspiring design no doubt. Extremely fresh to look at, now if only that front could have been made a touch more catish. Callum's design sees those front lights tapered in the wrong direction probably. Makes it look a touch timid unlike the pretty aggressive outgoing XK, now that was really like the animal they call themselves. But I sure as hell would love to own a car that looks the way it does and moves the way it will with a 420 hp V8 under that feline hood.
But don't bother when Aston Martin is in the picture. For the Bond lovers, nothing matches up to Bond. But for me it's not about Bond, for me Aston Martin says it all. It's the type of car I would like to keep in my living room. Extremely romantic, class personified is Aston, it's in a league of it's own and extremely unique in identity. I remember seeing the DB7 for the first time, I mean in print. And what a sight. At that time, it definitley was one of the top few of my most-beautiful-cars-in-the-world list. The DB's and the Vanquish are pure Aston. That V8 Vantage probably looks a touch arrogant though, an Aston does not need to be. Astons can carry themselves on pure class with hardly an eye to match it. And just check out the interiors. I don't know how many animals they kill for it, but they look killer for sure. Aston Martin - luxury and performance never came in a better package.
So if there is anything to complain about now, it's for the sellers. Now that we have brought the cars here, I hope they get the buyers. Because I am just going to be looking. And I am not too sure how many people cash out in crores or it's multiples for buying a car. So who is going to buy me one?